What was I poisoned with?

I am still looking for answers, I cried out to Jesus but still no answer, it's like no one tells me maybe a messenger on God on yahoo can tell me, I think I heard him speak once, he said b????? o?????? two drugs combined but I couldn't make that out. RIght now I am in my room crying and thinking of suicide because every since that incident people have been horrible to me and they don't treat me like a human being anymore, they treat me like an object or little boy, I try to tell them I was poisoned and that I had brain damage, only two people really understood me, one I think was an older peson and I think he was a child of God based on his kindness and that and one was another person who occasionally bothered me, everyone used to take me seriously until I received a brain injury, what I was poisoned with was dark blue if someone knows Jesus/God please ask, I am very sad in tears in the inside, emotionally broken down, sometimes I think of suicide or death but I get very afraid, there is no hope for me and not very many people are understanding as those two people were.